Overcoming My “Cool” Around the Table

Dinner-SelfieThe year was 2012, I was a sophomore in high school, and I decided that since I had turned 16, I was far too cool for family dinner. Looking back, this was a highly detrimental decision considering my mom always managed to concoct a tasty meal including all the major food groups every night, without fail.

Attempting to tackle my new sophomore sense of "cool", I began not skipping meals with my family (as that would mean cooking for myself, which is not a particular skill of mine), but rather trying to force my food down as fast as I could in order to get the "family time" out of the way. This way, I could get back to my room and, more importantly, my awaiting social life on my phone.

I never took the time to savor the awesome meal my mom had made, or make the effort to ask my family about their days. It wasn't until the end of my junior year when I was truly so stressed I HAD to sit down and tell my parents about my day that I realized how important family dinners are to me.

I've been blessed with a family that eats together almost every night, and I'm far more grateful for that now than I ever was growing up. It's unfortunate that I went through my two year phase of annoyance with these meals, and more importantly, my seventeen years of not giving them the credit and gratitude they deserve. During my first week taking an AP Statistics class this year, we were all asked to conduct an independent survey, and one group chose to ask, "How often do you sit down and eat dinner with your family?" I was shocked to hear the results that 36% of those surveyed eat with their families two times or less every week, and of that result, 24% was composed of the answer "0". It never crossed my mind that so many kids never sat down to eat with their families, and I began to think about how foreign of an idea that was to me.

After contemplating how I would feel if I wasn't given the opportunity to eat a meal with my family every night, I realized that I have learned that family dinner goes beyond just enjoying tasty food together. It's the sense of sheer togetherness that is so critical in today's world, especially during one's teen years. The teen years (high school in particular) are filled with new and exciting relationships, end of the world breakups, crazy teachers that "just really don't understand," and more stress in a 24-hour time frame some days than most people experience in a week. Expectations are high, maintaining your goals is a constant priority, and teens often find it difficult just to catch a break.

It is because of all this craziness, though, that I came to value my own family dinners. Having the opportunity to just sit back and relax for a 30 plus minute time frame became a necessity to my day. The dinner table truly became my place where I didn't have to talk or worry about anything that stressed me out, while simultaneously being the place where I could talk about everything and anything I needed or wanted to discuss. Some days I ranted about my swim practice, other days I reenacted ridiculous scenarios I would observe during the school day. I could relieve my stress without feeling like I was "wasting homework time", since I did have to eat after all, and since hanging out with my family turned out to be not so terrible. This idea of togetherness became implemented in my brain, and I found myself wanting to spend more and more time "around the table" just sharing thoughts and stories.

With busy schedules, I am the first to understand how hard it can be to gather several members of a family together at one time for a meal. But, be it one time a week or seven, try and set aside time for your family, friends, and loved ones to gather "around the table." While enjoying food together is never a disappointment, try and go beyond the food and savor the moments made, laughs shared, and people surrounding you. As I learned, no one is ever too cool for their family, and time spent together can in fact be "the coolest."